This is a follow-up to the article Why Does a loving God allow suffering. Like that article, this article too was written, not as some doctrinal thesis, but rather from the perspective of a member of Central who has walked this path.

Why does God Hate me?

If you're wrestling with this question, then you are almost certainly passing through a very difficult point in your life. Let me start by saying how sorry I am. I know what that's like. I've been in your shoes and I've asked that question myself.

This may feel wrong, but it's true:

God doesn't hate you. He loves you.

If you've stumbled across Christian websites that minimize your pain and your grief and who've offered this up as a pat answer that "you really should know", I'm sorry. Such an answer is both wrong and insensitive.

There are indeed times in our lives when God, at a minimum feels distant, and at a maximum, feels actively hostile. Life isn't always easy.

But even then, God still loves you.

So, why then does a loving God allow suffering?

This question sits at the very heart of “Why does God hate me?” and it isn’t an easy question to answer. I gave it my best shot in the article, "Why does a Loving God allow suffering?"

Our God is a God of Love

I know, that's hard to hear and even harder to believe when life is so difficult and so painful.

But remember what love is. Love isn't an emotion. It's an action. It's a decision - a choice. To be a choice, there must be an alternative - hate, fear, greed, everything that isn't love. Love is the very core of other-centered action, placing others before yourself.

For love to truly exist, that choice must exist and where that choice exists, love won’t always be chosen.

This is the broken world that we live in.

In a broken world, choosing to love is a very courageous step, a step that sometimes brings with it immense suffering. 

I believe that God knows that the existence of this suffering is the price of love in a broken world. And God believes that suffering — both his and ours — is a price worth paying for love.

“All things work together for good to those who love the Lord.” – Romans 8:28

Romans 8:28 does not say “in all good things”; it says “in all things”. That is not a subtle difference. It is a profound one.

Not all things are good.

Believing that all things can work together for good, when we know that many things are objectively bad, is a very difficult ask.

God is asking us to trust him even when he allows objectively bad things to happen. God is asking us to trust that he will use those bad things, along with the good, for good.

And He asks us to trust him when He says he loves us. 

Suffering is not punishment, it's a consequence of life in a broken world - a world where love is a choice that isn't always taken.

It's not easy and God knows this.

But, if you ask him, he will be there for you, to walk through the fire with you. He won't take that fire away, but he will be with you, in the midst of that fire.

I know, none of this sounds particularly comforting.

But this is where the church is supposed to step in.

Instead of giving you pat answers, the role of the church is to come alongside, to acknowledge your pain and to offer comfort and support. The role of the church is to show you God's love for you and this is something we all need the church to do at some point. And finally, the church is people and sometimes, we are called to be the church.

That's what friends are supposed to do.